Monthly Archives: August 2009

In-gory-ous Basterds

I’m not going to see ‘Inglourious Basterds.’  On principle.

I love movies….all kinds of ‘em.  I try not to write off any genre or actor or director because I think you miss out that way.  In fact, I’ve lectured people when they do that very thing.  (For example, I believe a lot of people missed out by writing off ‘Twilight.’  If you still haven’t seen it, rent the DVD.  You’ll thank me.)

But I have given Quentin Tarentino quite a few chances, and he and I just don’t see eye-to-eye.  I know many critics and moviegoers love his point of view and his creativity…and I don’t dispute that he has a definite dose of both.

But I think filmmakers like Tarentino and Eli Roth — who directed the irresponsible torture film ‘Hostel’ (that Tarentino produced) and who also stars in ‘Basterds’ — are doing us all a disservice by splashing around such unholy gore in their creations.

If we can sit through such blatant displays of death and dismemberment and not be affected, what does that say about us as human beings?  And why then are we surprised that teenagers are killing each other in high schools?  Or that professional football players are choking the life out of dogs with their own hands?

We as a generation are becoming numb to overwhelming displays of violence.  It’s something that we laugh at…and cheer on…and give five-star ratings to, as in the case of ‘Inglourious Basterds.’

Don’t get me wrong; I love the idea behind the film.  A Jewish revenge fantasy against the Nazis?  Brilliant.  But in the hands of Tarentino — in just the glimpses that I have seen in the trailer — ‘Basterds’ is a gore fest that I choose not to support or applaud.

GLEE: A+ GLEE Marketing: A++++++++

I saw the first (and only) episode of ‘GLEE’ earlier this year and loved it. Fun. Original. Inspiring, even. Can’t wait for the series this fall.

But — oh my god — can you believe the GLEE promotion and marketing?

Remember, we have only seen one episode. And already, we’re talking multi-city tour. Throngs of fans wherever they go. Fans who already have a nickname — GLEEKs — after one episode.

This is not a natural phenomenon, my friend. This is the result of a well-designed, extremely well-executed media machine. And whoever is driving it deserves a raise, another raise, and a new car.

Long live GLEE. And long live the marketing mind(s) behind GLEE.

I think I am in love with them.  Call me.

The Myth of Selflessness

Doctors are now able to help woman at the age of 50 and beyond conceive and bear children.

But should they? No. A resounding no.

There’s a reason a woman can’t naturally have a baby after a certain age. It’s the body’s way of protecting her and the child. Having that baby could kill her. And if she is lucky enough to carry that baby full term, the child probably won’t be lucky enough to have parents past junior high.

All these overly zealous ‘I-have-to-have-a baby’ people need to actually put the baby’s needs first. Show the selfless intentions that are always automatically associated with parenthood…and don’t have a baby when you are well past the age when you can somewhat guarantee that you will be around to usher them through their developmental years.

I lost both my parents at a young age due to sudden death and disease. You never get over that loss. It colors your entire life, your every choice.

We shouldn’t set up future generations to be practically assured of losing their parents when they are still babies.

Who’s the boob here?

It was horrific enough that model Jasmine Fiore was brutally murdered, her teeth pulled, her fingers cut off at the knuckles. But then police identified her body by the serial numbers on her breast implants…and told the press, who told everyone else.

Ugh.

I know Jasmine and her family would prefer her alive today, but I’m personally glad she isn’t around to experience this further degradation. While I’m happy the police were able to identify her body, this unnecessary public humiliation is a gross violation of her person, living or dead.

She’s not some micro-chipped dog. Revealing these details of the investigation to the media treated Jasmine like less than one.

The Google Experiment

Since this a fairly new blog, I googled “sticky egg” to see if it appeared anywhere near the top of the search results yet.  Not even close.

Turns out, when folks are searching the term ‘sticky egg,’ their primary concern is how to scrap the darn thing out of a pan!

So…my blog title is analogous with a common household annoyance? Hmmm… that seems about right.

(Oh — and if you actually found me by way of a Google search, I don’t want you to go away empty handed. Placing the pan under cold running water lifts the cooked egg right off.)

Bon appetit!

Cookie Monster

I’ll keep this short. I have never made cookies — packaged or from scratch — and not eaten at least a spoonful or two of the raw dough.

That’s the best part, for cripe’s sake.

And now Nestle has gone and put a “Do not consume raw cookie dough” warning on their package because there’s a risk of salmonella from the uncooked eggs. (Apparently this is true if you make the dough from scratch, too.)

Thanks for ruining a great American tradition, Nestle. With that queasy image in mind, I won’t be able to get the spoon to my lips.

Might not make cookies again, either.

Get ‘em, Tiger

I love golf.

I’ve only played putt putt and a single round of par 3 in my ‘career,’ but I am a passionate and loyal spectator. When Tiger Woods is playing, there is nothing more exciting to watch on television — and yes, I am talking about golf.

No one on the PGA Tour works harder than Tiger.  This hard work has amassed a record that is on pace to surpass all the greats.  I wouldn’t think anyone would question it.

And yet today I read that Peter Thomson, Australia’s first golfer, belittled Tiger for continuing to be coached.

“It’s absurd that the world’s greatest golfer is taking lessons,” Thomson said. “A pro should puzzle it out for himself. The young players need to find another system.”

Perhaps Thomson’s attitude is the reason he was first only in Australia. Any truly talented professional — golfer, chef, writer, speaker  — who thinks they have learned everything they can about their specialty does, at that very moment, begin to lose aspects of their skill. Only consistent practice and an openness to new techniques will keep their skills sharp and their expertise relevant over time.

As great as Tiger is, he could easily close himself off and do what we knows. Kudos to him for constantly learning, adapting, and winning, time and again, in new, exciting ways.

Travels with Rory

I travel a lot for business, and I don’t mind it a bit. Airports, on a certain level, are familiar and comfortable to me.

I have a routine. Once I get through the necessary annoyance of security, I head to the nearest Hudson News and get a drink, trail mix with M&Ms – I’m not that good – and a USA Today, because the puzzle is challenging yet doable. (As I previously mentioned, I’m not that good.)

I look pretty much like any business traveler, and I am treated as such. Invisible. I move from Point A to Point B, hopefully with as few delays as possible.

And then there are the days, like today, when I travel with my dog Rory.

Rory is also a seasoned traveler. Nearly 11 years old, he has been flying as an in-cabin pet since he was six months old.  He has his routine as well.

After I carry him through security, where he is smiled at and repeatedly told “what a good dog you are,” he eagerly gets back into his carrier. We go to the gate, where he enjoys a snack and final drink of water before we board the plane.

During snack time, he is smiled at, talked to, and usually petted depending on the age and interest level of his admirers. This attention often continues inside the plane…and in baggage claim…and even outside the terminal, when he is finally free to take a quick pee and walk.

Rory’s travels are filled with love and attention. I want to get into that business.

No Kids

A French woman — who I have no doubt is a bit sticky herself — has written a book ‘NO KIDS: 40 Good Reasons Not to Have Children.’

I’m sure many mothers stateside are up in arms. I haven’t even read the book yet (only the review on Amazon.com – full disclosure), but you have to admit, some of her reasons are spot-on.

•You will lose touch with your friends
•Your sex life will be over
•Children cost a fortune
•Vacations will be a nightmare
•You’ll lose your identity and become just “mom” or “dad”
•The planet’s already overcrowded

You can’t argue with any of them overly much, no matter how much you love your kids.  And I speak as a proud dog mother.  I may have made the choice to avoid the human variety, but some of the same issues apply.

Personally, I am most anxious to see the movie based on this book. Will our heroine stick to her guns and fight to bring more women around to her way of thinking? Or will they turn it into a romantic comedy where she sees the error of her ways, succumbing to the need to have a child…like Diane Keaton in ‘Baby Boom?’

And, most importantly, is it too late to purchase the screen rights myself?