Category Archives: Beauty

Sin skin

What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

But what happens when it doesn’t?

I’m in Sin City this weekend on business and, after my meetings yesterday, was getting the lay of the land at the Aria Las Vegas hotel and casino, since it’s new to me (and Vegas).

As I’m walking around seeing the sights — and the people, who are always a sight in Vegas — I spied a tattoo or two or three.  And it got me thinking:

If you get a tat in Vegas, that certainly doesn’t stay in Vegas.  That sucker comes home with you.  (And depending on where it’s located, everybody knows about it, too.)

Vegas offers some doozies to remember your adventures by. 


 

 

 

 

Wonder which tat I’ll pick?

Splitting hairs

Bearding is a competitive sport.

I did not know this.

I didn’t even know bearding was a word, let alone a concept — the growing of facial hair by, um, athletes.

You see, I watched a movie on IFC yesterday, and it was inundated with promos for Whisker Wars, a reality show slated for a seven-episode run on IFC in August and September.

Whisker Wars follows Beard Team USA, a ‘devoted group of whisker warriors’ as they compete for top bearding honors at events across the country.  Their journey culminates at the World Championship Competition in Trondhjem, Norway.

Apparently Germany is the longtime favorite in hair growing — I’m so proud of my kin — but this year, Beard Team USA stands a follicle of a chance.

I am obviously entertained by this whole idea.  I mean, there are even beard categories: Moustache, Partial Beard, Full Beard Groomed, Freestyle and what is considered the most prestigious, Full Beard Natural.  Gosh, I’m so excited my hairs are standing on end!

But seriously, guys — I think you have finally come up with the one competition that women will never ask for their own division.

Even the ones who can compete.

Shirt off your back

The rich pay fewer taxes, and celebrities get free clothes — just some of life’s many injustices.

But you would think — if you were one of those lucky celebs — you’d wear free clothing that was a) good-looking and b) looked good on you.

Case in point:  Express has been giving away the same blue-and-red striped dress to a lot of young actresses in Hollywood.  Take a look-see:

Now, with the exception of January Jones (who is many months pregnant right now), these are some of the skinniest women on the planet..and yet the broad, horizontal stripes make them appear short and wide and thick, which I doubt was the goal.

(Imagine what this dress would look like on someone of average size, height and weight.  No, I take that back…don’t.)

I know it’s free, ladies, but that doesn’t mean you have to wear it.  Your jobs all pay pretty well.  Although you may have forgotten how, you can pay for your own clothing…just like the rich can pay more taxes.

(Well, it’s fun to think about anyway…isn’t it?)

Fowl play

It’s only week two of Project Runway, and Facebook has already been overrun with comments pre-, during and post-show.

I’ve tried to abstain.

But the judges’ decision to give Olivier the win over Anthony Ryan was the first travesty of the new season.  The finger must be pointed.

In the ‘My Pet Project’ Challenge, the designers had to use items found in Petland Discounts to create their garments.  Tim Gunn warned them that the use of ready-made fabrics would be penalized.

Anthony Ryan created his dress completely out of birdseed, fashioning an inspired collar out of larger, darker seeds.  Olivier used existing fabric from a dog bed to fashion the top of his dress, and then finished the skirt with tie-dyed hamster bedding.

The only fault the judges could find with Anthony’s dress?  It was a wee bit short.  (He had intended to finish the skirt with feathers and nixed them at the last minute.)

Olivier’s fit and styling were both called into question, and there was the little issue of the dog bed material in the bodice.

Heidi loved Anthony’s dress.  So did the guest judge.  But loud, obnoxious Nina Garcia whined about the length of Anthony’s dress.

And so Olivier was declared the winner.

I know it’s early yet, but I had an immediate flashback to last year’s finale — the judges’ stand-off over the Project Runway winner.  I questioned Nina’s judgment then, and I question it now.

I think it’s time for Nina to be ‘out.’

Seeing red

I’ve seen a lot of articles online of late listing what’s hot and what’s not in the world of summer fashion.  Nothing too shocking, really — white, crochet and color blocking are all the rage.

Can I add my own entry to the ‘what’s not’ list?

SUNBURNS

Especially since the July 4th holiday weekend, I have seen more folks walking around my neighborhood burnt to a crisp.

And I’m sorry — there’s just no excuse for it.

In this day and age where there is a different sunscreen and sunblock lotion or cream for every skin type, time of day, and SPF imaginable, that kind of blood-red, all-over burn is unacceptable.

Sure, we’ve all gotten burnt ‘around the edges’ where we’ve missed rubbing in the lotion from time to time.  But not putting on any protection…when you’re out in the sun at the beach or on the boat all day?

That’s just stupid.

And don’t give me the ol’ song-and-dance about you doing this ‘all the time,’ or that ‘it fades into a tan.’

I’ll have to smack you in the sunburn.

Smile!

A good friend’s son recently announced on Facebook that he was getting braces.

His status updates on the big event were a countdown of sorts, beginning the day before, then that morning.  After the orthodontist had done the deed, he posted, “Four hours down, 21 months to go.”

Oh, how I know that feeling.

I had braces, too.  In fact, my mother had three kids in braces (and would have had four if my oldest brother hadn’t conveniently knocked out his front teeth in a bicycle accident and required more drastic measures).

Of all the gifts my mother gave me in life — and there were too many to list here — I look back on those two years in braces with much love and gratitude.  I know they were costly, especially multiplied by three.  But what an investment they were for our future health and happiness.

Plus, since the orthodontist was in Paducah, Kentucky — a 30-minute drive from my hometown — the monthly check-ups meant missing a half-day of school.  Oh, how I loved those trips with Mom!  We’d get the dental appointment out of the way, then go shopping or eat.

And she’d always made sure there was a treat I could eat (since so much was nixed by my mouth full of metal).

So, I hope my friend can appreciate his time ‘under the wire.’  Thanks to my mom, it put the smile on my face.

The beaten path

I could stare at this all day.

I took the photo myself — yesterday morning in fact — while I was walking Rory in the park surrounding the American Museum of Natural History.

(The one with the dinosaurs?  Yeah, that one.)

The tulips in their border gardens are amazing this year.  I’ve taken dozens of pics during our daily strolls. I especially like this shot because, in that particular flower bed, one lone lavender tulip has braved the red masses on the edge of the green.

Hey, it ain’t easy being lavender.

Of course, the color makes it stand out all the more, so he’s the one you notice out of all those flowers.  Bet he never guessed that would happen when he was just a bulb….back when the red tulips wouldn’t  let him play their “raindrop games.”

God, I’m a goof.

But it’s funny how a simple flower can evoke such memories of childhood.  Being different — by choice or by design — and staying the course regardless of peer pressure or outside influences. And sometimes it’s nothing more than where you were planted in the first place.  (I’m kinda liking this whole floral metaphor…)

So, let’s get out there today, and get our bloom on!

High cheese

I love grilled cheese sandwiches.  As I’ve mentioned here before, I have eaten them at pretty much every restaurant I’ve visited that offers one.

But would I want to walk a million miles on that same grilled cheese?  Not so much.

Well…maybe if it looked like this.


A fashion student from Bath Spa University in London designed these cheesy platforms in a competition sponsored by Pilgrim’s Choice to promote dairy farming in the region.

Lisa Dillon used West Country Cheddar and stale ‘heels’ of bread to sculpt the festive footwear, which will be on display at the Royal Bath and West Show, a county fair of sorts.

I personally hope that restaurants take note of Dillon’s creation.  Wouldn’t you love to order a grilled cheese or tuna melt or chicken salad, even..and see a sculpted sandwich like that arrive on your plate?

They could charge a whole lot more..and folks would pay, too.

Fancy sandwiches indeed!

No skin off me

It ain’t easy being pale. That’s why, some 11 years ago, I founded the PPA.

Pasty People of America

I’m not only the president, I’m a member…the pastiest member by far. You know that pale skin that kinda has a bluish glow?

That’s me.

A friend in Kansas City — also pale, also self-deprecating — inspired me to use the word ‘pasty.’  He too is a member for life.  (No choice, really.)  Today I am inspired by people who have a choice and stay pale, even at prom time.

The Melanoma Foundation of New England asked teens to sign a ‘no-tan pledge’ — a promise not to intentionally tan or visit a tanning salon before prom.  There was a similar pledge for college students before spring break.

The pledge reads:  “I realize that by getting a tan I am sharply increasing my chances of developing melanoma, which can be fatal if not caught in time. I have read the “Facts of Tanning” and understand the dangers of tanning beds and lying out in the sun.”

It was a contest, of course.  The winning school — the pastiest party-goers come prom time –  won $1,000 for their class.

This year’s winner was Waltham High School in Waltham, Massachusetts. 

Hey — I think I recognize that one student.

Cheaters.