Category Archives: Comedy

Stylin’

Bill Murray is cool.

Part of what makes him cool is the distance he maintains from the public and the press. Which means no autographs. Which can make him seem rather uncool to some.

Well, look what he did in lieu of an autograph for filmmaker David Walton Smith.

 

Coolest dude on the planet.

Can’t wait to see what he does in Moonrise Kingdom, Wes Anderson’s new movie that opened yesterday.

Bet it’s cool, too.

Any questions?

There is one word that immediately invokes my ire. Makes me see red.  And I admit my response is a bit unreasonable.

“Thoughts?”

I don’t know why I have such a negative knee-jerk reaction to the phrase.

Maybe because it’s not a phrase at all. 

You’re asking me a question — you want my input, my point of view, my expertise — but the very question is so non-committal, so throw-away.

Like you can’t be bothered to ask me a question with any nuance or…

WORDS.

Or maybe you don’t want to reveal your hand before I lay my cards on the table.  Well, it didn’t work this time, did it??

You see, I can read a lot into one word of conversation.

I’m a girl.

Broadway Harry

Potted Potter, the parody of the seven Harry Potter books now on Broadway, was tailor-made for kids.

It’s only 70-minutes long, is super high energy, and even features a quidditch match with audience participation.

 

No wonder I liked it so much.

Brits Dan Clarkson and Jeff Turner, who also wrote the show, bring all the characters to life with minimal props, costumes and staging.  The humor is decidedly British as well, but Potter lovers — and the family and friends who they drag along — will find it easy to translate.

Obviously some plot points are skipped in such a short synopsis, but the ones that made the cut are treated with high hilarity.  Favorites include Lord Voldemort, the dragons from book four, and the bigger-than-life quidditch snitch.

Dan and Jeff cracked up a few times during the show, but the reason was pretty obvious –

They are as wild about Harry as the audience.

Sweets for the sweet

I had big dreams as a kid — live in New York City, be on TV, write a book.  Well, I have a new one to add to that list:

Be immortalized in cake.

Betty White was.

We’re talking a 5’2″ life-size vanilla cake with buttercream, covered in modeling chocolate.  It was created by Cake Boss star Buddy Valastro and his team.

And you thought Betty couldn’t get any sweeter.

The cake was served at Wednesday night at Betty’s roast at the Friars Club here in New York City…hence their motto at the base (where Betty’s feet should be).

Funny thing — being roasted?

Not on my list.

Tragic

I was very sad to learn that Mary Kennedy, wife of Robert Kennedy, Jr., was found dead yesterday at his home in Bedford, New York.

I met them years ago on a plane, and liked them both very both.  So the loss seems very personal.

Below is the blog entry I wrote in 2010 about my Kennedy encounter.

—————

I read today that Bobby Kennedy, Jr. filed for a divorce from his wife Mary. That’s too bad.  They seemed like such a nice couple…

When I met them.

Yeah, you read it right.  I met Bobby and Mary Kennedy.  They sat next to me on a flight from Denver to Aspen.  We were all en route to the 2nd Annual US Comedy Arts Festival. I was on a research trip for Hallmark Cards; Bobby was going to introduce Garry Trudeau, his good friend and creator of the “Doonesbury” comic strip, who was being honored at the festival.

The small jet had no first class; that’s why they were seated next to me.  I recognized them immediately when they boarded just moments before take-off — my mother loved the Kennedys like most Catholics of her generation — but I didn’t let on.

They were very friendly and chatted with me during the short flight.  When they realized I was going to the festival as well, they mentioned their friend Garry — by first name only — and said ‘perhaps they’d see me there.’

It was a great story to share with my co-workers, who were seated elsewhere on the plane.

I attended the Doonesbury retrospective and only made the ‘Kennedy connection’ when Bobby stepped up to the podium to introduce ‘his friend Garry.’  After the event was over, attendees were invited to a gallery next door exhibiting framed “Doonesbury” cartoons.

As I was milling around with my co-workers, I suddenly heard shouts of  “Carla!  Carla!”  There across the room were Mary and Bobby Kennedy, smiling and waving.  Garry Trudeau stood at their side.

The rest of the evening was kind of a rock star moment for me.  I got to hang with the Kennedys for a while.  I met Garry Trudeau, whose comic strips helped Watergate make sense, and I was able to get his autograph for my brother Kent.

And best of all?  The look on my co-workers’ faces.

Priceless.

Looney tunes

We all know that B-list celebrities do reality shows to boast their sagging careers.  But to reveal their mental instabilities?

That’s just a viewer bonus.

I decided to watch this season of Celebrity Apprentice because Adam Corolla was in the cast.  I had seen him on Dancing with the Stars , and he was one of my favorites — self-effacing, witty, and yet really trying to win.

I like that.

Tragically, Adam was fired quite early on Apprentice. But Lisa Lampanelli, a comedienne I’ve never heard of until now, has provided more than ample entertainment.

It’s not that she’s that funny.  She’s mean.  Really mean.  And she has a tremendous ego.  (She is the smartest and most important person in the room and in every challenge, don’t you know.)

In the boardroom, where Donald Trump fires folks each week, she hurls verbal and mental abuse and F-bombs…and cries as a last resort.

She’s a fricking looney.

I don’t know if Lisa will win Celebrity Apprentice, but I doubt she is winning over any new fans in this endeavor.

Except perhaps a long line of psychiatrists, just chomping at the bit for her business.

Hot time

So, this happened.

I worked at home yesterday and had just sat down to eat lunch when someone rang my front door. Assuming it was UPS, I buzzed him in and stepped into my coop’s hallway.

My dog Rory ran ahead to greet my visitor and brought back…

HIM

Okay, not this particular fireman.  The firefighter in my building had black hair and was tragically wearing his shirt uniform.  But still –

He was smoking hot!

I said, “Are we on fire?” and he flashed a perfect smile.

Well, I was.

He explained he was conducting the building’s yearly walk-through, and proceeded to ask some questions about the basement and elevator access while he petted my dog Rory.

To soon, he was on his way.  But my heart was happy.  You see, the firehouse is only one block away.

Rory, it’s time to try a different walk route!

Pork poem

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If any meat deserves a rhyme,
It would be pork…every time.

Oh yeah — that sings!

Funny, isn’t it?

Can any good come out of a dare?

Only friendships that last a lifetime.

A couple of decades ago (when I couldn’t have been more than five), a good friend and colleague at Hallmark Cards dared me to audition for an improv troupe in Kansas City called Lighten Up.

I accepted the challenge, was shocked to be chosen for their workshops, and soon found myself performing on the Lighten Up stage.

The next five years of my life were cast.  Every Friday and Saturday night I was on that stage.  And the players who I performed with soon became some of the best friends of my life.

They still are to this day.

That’s why I’m thrilled to rejoin the original members of the Lighten Up Improv Company tonight in a reunion performance.  Many of us haven’t done improv in years, so the show should be funny on many levels.

But hanging out with my best friends?

In the words of Trish Berrong, ‘that’s just stupid fun.’

Weeeeee!

A bear sliding down a hill on his backside?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Picture: Duncan Usher (Solent News, Bavaria Germany)

Nothing I can say tops that!