I have never followed an intense exercise routine.
I am a big believer in ‘all things in moderation’ — in both food and physical activity.
But I have recently been inspired to follow a new upper-body strength routine that I think could catch on around the globe:
Donald Trump Pinata Challenge
1. Buy pinata in likeness of annoyingly-ignorant businessman and Republican presidential candidate.
2. Get really big stick.
3. Beat the crap out of that thang, honing upper body strength while reducing frustrations with Trump and flawed political process.
4. Repeat 2-3 times each week.
Note: if you put candy in pinata per tradition, this could reduce positive outcomes of routine.
Posted in Business, Celebrities, Comedy, Exercise, Health, Humor, Life, Politics
Tagged Business, candy, celebrities, comedy, Donald Trump, exercise, Health, Humor, life, pinata, politics, upper body strength, workout
I’ve never gotten involved in the online debate about whether or not to vaccinate children. Since I don’t have kids, I figured I would stay out of that fight (although I vaccinate my dog, so we can probably guess where I might land).
I have to wonder, though, if this TV commercial is making the back-and-forth even more heated…
Not only vaccinate your kids but re-vaccinate in their teens? The anti-vax crowd must be foaming at the mouth. But the ad’s emotional argument is effective.
Once again — staying out of it.
Posted in Advertising, Children, Family, Health, Humor, Internet, Youtube
Tagged advertising, anti-vax, children, commercial, debate, Dogs, family, fight, foaming at the mouth, Health, Humor, Internet, meningitis, ringside seats, vaccinations, vax, Youtube
When you go to the lady doctor for your yearly poke-and-prod, some tests aren’t so yearly anymore.
Depending on your age and family history, your physician may recommend a Pap smear, for example, every two years… or a mammogram only after age 40.
(My family history is so checkered, I get to do these type of tests every year, but I’ve heard rumors.)
The other thing you have to do every time you walk in a doctor’s office is a weight check. This I feel should change.
The nurse usually takes my weight, after consulting my chart. Unless I appear to have ballooned to an obese level, I don’t feel this is a necessary measure. It’s not the way I want to start the conversation, either…
Unless the nurse takes his/her weight, too. Then we have something to discuss.
Posted in Family, Health, Humor
Tagged conversation, doctor, doctor's office, family, family history, gynocologist, Health, Humor, mammogram, medical chart, medical exam, medical tests, nurse, obese, pap smear, weight, weighty subject, yearly physical
This is a cake that looks like veggies.
That totally counts.
Posted in Cooking, Design, Food, Health, Humor
Tagged cake, cooking, design, eating healthy, food, Health, Humor, vegetables, veggie cake
One of the first things I saw on television this morning was the commercial featuring “Mr. Hyperbole” Terry Bradshaw promoting the vaccine for shingles:
Since I have had the misfortune to have shingles twice at an unusually young age, I feel like I need to speak up — to confirm that what he’s saying is true (because his style of delivery can sometimes appear false).
Shingles is a bitch, pure and simple.
You have a horrible, itchy rash on your skin, just as Terry described. But what makes it 10 times worse is that the pain runs far deeper. It’s like your internal organs are on fire, and your muscles ache — all at the same time. And you have the rash to deal with, too.
Quite simply, you are miserable.
I had my first case of shingles in my 20’s on my back, which is a fairly classic presentation. It made breathing almost impossible. In my early 40’s, it reappeared on my shin, which is so unusual, it took ER doctors two days and a ridiculous amount of testing to diagnose. I had phantom leg pain from that case of shingles for almost two years.
I wouldn’t wish shingles on my worse enemy, so if your doctor recommends the vaccine, give it serious consideration.
Terry and I aren’t lying.
Posted in Advertising, Celebrities, Commentary, Health, Humor, Sports, Television
Tagged advertising, armchair quarterback, breathing, celebrities, classic presentation, commentary, commercial, ER doctor, football, Health, Humor, hyperbole, internal organs, medical diagnosis, medical testing, muscle ache, muscles, pain, phantom pain, quarterback, rash, shin, shingles, shingles vaccine, skin rash, Sports, Television, Terry Bradshaw
It started out as a joke between my friend Wendy and her husband.
“You’d have to pay me $10,000 to go see the Entourage movie.”
Wendy had the gumption to turn the joke into a GoFundMe campaign to raise money for CureSearch, which supports research for pediatric cancers.
One short week later, thanks to the generosity of friends and family and countless others who only know Wendy’s story through word of mouth, articles and blogs like mine, ‘the joke’ has now raised over $30,000.
Wendy is closing the GoFundMe page and, as promised, is going to:
- See the Entourage movie not once, not twice, but four times
- Wear ‘Drama Mama’ pajamas to the theater
- Drink her favorite beverage from a specially-designed Turtle cup
And donors that contributed funds at the higher levels get to come along to the theater and witness Wendy’s exquisite agony.
Thank you for your donations. And enjoy the show!
Posted in Comedy, Entertainment, Health, Humor, Movies
Tagged blog, cancer, charity, comedy, CureSearch, donation, entertainment, entourage, generosity, GoFundMe, Health, Humor, joke, Movies, pediatric cancer
Since my post last night, my friend Wendy Molyneux (who also happens to be a writer for Bob’s Burgers) has, as of 3pm ET today, raised almost $8,800 for CureSearch.
Because she hates Entourage and really does not want to see the movie. And hates pediatric cancers even more.
To up the ante, she has promised to wear this lovely ‘drama mama’ pajama ensemble to the theater if she raises her goal of $10,000 by midnight tonight PT. She’ll also likely tweet her agony to the masses, and that will be hilarious.
So give if you can. We both appreciate it.
Update to the update:
We did it! Wendy has already well-surpassed her $10,000 goal! But she is giving you new reasons to give (besides the obvious to help fight cancer). Here is her latest post:
Well, this has not worked out very well. Thanks to all of the terrible people I know and a bunch of awful strangers I’ve NEVER EVEN MET WHO CARE ABOUT CHILDREN’S CANCER, I’ve reached 10K in one day. If this madness continues, I am going to have to drink movie soda out of a Turtle sipper my effing sister made (if this hits 15K), AND if for some reason this goes on all the way to 20K I am going to have to see this movie twice. TWICE. This is a mess. All I know is this nightmare will end on June 3rd when Entourage premieres and the world as we know it ends. Screw all of you and your goddamned BIG HEARTS. You are the worst.
Told you she was hilarious.
Posted in charity, Comedy, Family, Health, Humor, Love, Movies, Television
Tagged Bob's Burgers, cancer, charity, comedy, CureSearch, donation, drama, drama mama, entourage, family, Health, Humor, life, love, Movies, pajamas, pediatric cancers, Television, tweet, Wendy Molyneux, writer