Category Archives: Television

Costume comedy

Love Downton Abbey?  The ol’ upstairs/downstairs drama?

How bout with some out-and-out silliness?

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Add Another Period (Tuesdays, Comedy Central) to your viewing /DVR schedule.

The name alone makes me happy. But the cast — including Michael Ian Black, Thomas Lennon, Jason Ritter,  Christina Hendricks and a host of others I can’t name — is game for anything, which makes the show crazy funny.

From what I can tell on Imdb.com, there are lots of great cameos planned, too, so you look forward to that.

Or, you can if you watch.

On the ball

For a sport with such small balls, golf is an unusually large target.

cu golf ballPeople who don’t watch it or understand the nuances of the game are quick to dismiss it as boring.

My mother never understood why I watched golf on TV as a young child. But if she sat with me for even 30 minutes, she would soon be ‘oohing’ and ‘ahhing’ over some of the precision shots the pros could pull off.

And in television golf tournaments, you see a lot of golf.  The cameras jump from tee to fairway to green, so you get to see sometimes 50+ different golfers swing the club or putt every 30 seconds or less.

So, contrary to what you might think, there is a lot of action in golf.

In contrast, televised baseball and football games — America’s sports — mostly involve standing around.  A Wall Street Journal study calculated that a baseball fan will see 17 minutes and 58 seconds of action over the course of a three-hour game. And the football audience?  A paltry 11 minutes per game.

So for pure entertainment value, swing for swing, I’d put the US Open Golf Championship up against a baseball game any day. I’ve watched both, and I feel pretty good about my chances.

Armchair quarterback

One of the first things I saw on television this morning was the commercial featuring “Mr. Hyperbole” Terry Bradshaw promoting the vaccine for shingles:

Since I have had the misfortune to have shingles twice at an unusually young age, I feel like I need to speak up — to confirm that what he’s saying is true (because his style of delivery can sometimes appear false).

Shingles is a bitch, pure and simple.

You have a horrible, itchy rash on your skin, just as Terry described.  But what makes it 10 times worse is that the pain runs far deeper.  It’s like your internal organs are on fire, and your muscles ache — all at the same time.  And you have the rash to deal with, too.

Quite simply, you are miserable.

I had my first case of shingles in my 20’s on my back, which is a fairly classic presentation.  It made breathing almost impossible. In my early 40’s, it reappeared on my shin, which is so unusual, it took ER doctors two days and a ridiculous amount of testing to diagnose.  I had phantom leg pain from that case of shingles for almost two years.

I wouldn’t wish shingles on my worse enemy, so if your doctor recommends the vaccine, give it serious consideration.

Terry and I aren’t lying.

Best of binge

We all are born with certain talents or gifts.

Binge watching is one of mine.

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Now, you might argue that all of us can binge watch a television show or mini-series as long as we have access on Netflix or OnDemand.

I beg to differ.

As Liam Neeson would say, “It takes a particular set of skills.”

  1. Sitting still for long periods of time. I list this first because I feel it is most important. If you are a person who needs to ‘piddle,’ — always getting up and doing something, whether it’s eating or drinking or using the bathroom or organizing your pencils — binge watching will be difficult for you. It will take you weeks to watch the new season of Orange is the New Black. A true binge watcher can do it in two days. Max.
  2. Focus (or multi-tasking while still watching TV). I give you a choice here, because I find that I use both methods during my long binge-watching sessions.  Some episodes demand my complete attention. Others offer small windows of opportunity to check email or IM with a friend (which still ‘watching’ the program.) Can you handle the singularity?
  3. Organizing your life. You cannot take two days to binge watch House of Cards or Bloodlines unless you can clear your calendar.  And that involves getting things done in the days and weeks preceding the binge watch, which is made possible–in my house, anyway–by exhaustive list making.  If it isn’t written down, it usually doesn’t get done.  And I have to get a lot of stuff done to justify a big ol’ two-day binge.
  4. Bladder control. Contrary to popular belief, bladders do not come in a variety of sizes. They are all the same — male and female, adult and child. What does vary is our muscle control and ability to ‘hold our bladder.’ Not having to get up every 30 minutes makes #1 and #2 more plausible (and will help you be more efficient at checking off line items on #3).

Best of luck with your next binge watch!

More, please

Television and movie critics often bemoan the lack of originality on the small and big screens.

Sequels, remakes, and inspired-bys are everywhere,  it’s true…but it’s not all bad, right?

We’re all excited about the possibility of a Gilmore Girls movie, aren’t we? And The X-Files coming back?

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Plus, today I read a live-action Jonny Quest movie is in development. I loved that cartoon …especially his dog Bandit and best friend Haji.

I’d watch that.

Again.

Drama mama update

Since my post last night, my friend Wendy Molyneux (who also happens to be a writer for Bob’s Burgers) has, as of 3pm ET today, raised almost $8,800 for CureSearch.

Because she hates Entourage and really does not want to see the movie.  And hates pediatric cancers even more.

drama mama pjsTo up the ante, she has promised to wear this lovely ‘drama mama’ pajama ensemble to the theater if she raises her goal of $10,000 by midnight tonight PT. She’ll also likely tweet her agony to the masses, and that will be hilarious.

So give if you can.  We both appreciate it.

Update to the update:

We did it!  Wendy has already well-surpassed her $10,000 goal!  But she is giving you new reasons to give (besides the obvious to help fight cancer).  Here is her latest post:

Well, this has not worked out very well. Thanks to all of the terrible people I know and a bunch of awful strangers I’ve NEVER EVEN MET WHO CARE ABOUT CHILDREN’S CANCER, I’ve reached 10K in one day. If this madness continues, I am going to have to drink movie soda out of a Turtle sipper my effing sister made (if this hits 15K),  AND if for some reason this goes on all the way to 20K I am going to have to see this movie twice. TWICE. This is a mess. All I know is this nightmare will end on June 3rd when Entourage premieres and the world as we know it ends. Screw all of you and your goddamned BIG HEARTS. You are the worst.

Told you she was hilarious.

Faux pas

Fashion has always been a big draw in women’s tennis. Many of the top players, including both Williams sisters and Maria Sharapova, have their own clothing lines.

But the men?

More and more, they appear to be fashion victims of the labels who pay them to wear their clothing on court. And then at this week’s French Open, THIS happens…

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Who wore it better?

In that design, nobody wins.