Some ‘architects’ have built a Mayan pyramid out of chocolate big enough to kill us all.

In fact, this model of the Kukulcan Mayan pyramid in Chichen Itza, Mexico broke the Guinness World Record for the World’s Largest Chocolate Sculpture.

California dessert and pastry school Qzina labored more than 400 hours to create the six-foot high structure which weighs over 18,000 pounds.

That’s one-thirtieth the size of the original Mayan temple.

The chocolate sculpture will be destroyed on December 21 — the last date on the Mayan calendar.  According to the Qzina website, they haven’t decided exactly how to dismantle the thing.

Seriously?

I know a lot of folks who would volunteer to help make that baby disappear.

That’s how I did.

I had meant to see it in the theatre, but I tend to shy away from animal movies.  Even though I knew this one was positive — it’s based on true events — I hate seeing animals in any potential, dramatized or real trauma.

But I manned up and watched it today.  And I was right.  They found ways to make the animals — and me — suffer through this supposed feel-good story.

It’s so nice to cry with people you don’t know.

Which made the e-card that popped up in my Facebook feed today all the more timely:

You got that right.

But perhaps the set for Harvey, which is in previews on Broadway, needs just that.

About 20 minutes into the performance last night — as the home of Elwood P. Dowd transforms into the dread psychiatric hospital — a loud clunk was heard.  The set shuddered.  All action grinded to a halt.

And poor Jim Parsons, who was faux reading a book in the library, scurried away as they dropped the curtain.

The curtain dropped a lot last night; a cable snapped in the set mechanism that couldn’t be quickly repaired.  So every time the set changed, the curtain dropped and the lights came up.

Harvey lasted almost three hours.

I intended to review the play today, but it wouldn’t be fair.  While I found Jim Parsons’ Dowd utterly charming, the show itself didn’t get a fair shake because of the constant interruptions and expansive running time.

I was literally nodding off at the end.  Bnd that wasn’t really Harvey’s fault…or was it?

Darn pooka.

“Thoughts?”

I don’t know why I have such a negative knee-jerk reaction to the phrase.

Maybe because it’s not a phrase at all. 

You’re asking me a question — you want my input, my point of view, my expertise — but the very question is so non-committal, so throw-away.

Like you can’t be bothered to ask me a question with any nuance or…

WORDS.

Or maybe you don’t want to reveal your hand before I lay my cards on the table.  Well, it didn’t work this time, did it??

You see, I can read a lot into one word of conversation.

I’m a girl.

And now I’m trying to un-see this.

It’s a brain tapeworm, of all god-forsaken things.

Brain tapeworms?  Who even knew they existed?  I sure didn’t…until an innocent web search invited that knowledge into my head.

Hopefully not the tapeworms.

They can enter your system if you eat undercooked pork, since the larvae often attach to pig muscle.  And once there, they flow through the bloodstream and get stuck in cavities in the cranium.

I don’t want to know this!  You don’t either!!

But misery loves company.

Happy Monday.

Potted Potter, the parody of the seven Harry Potter books now on Broadway, was tailor-made for kids.

It’s only 70-minutes long, is super high energy, and even features a quidditch match with audience participation.

No wonder I liked it so much.

Brits Dan Clarkson and Jeff Turner, who also wrote the show, bring all the characters to life with minimal props, costumes and staging.  The humor is decidedly British as well, but Potter lovers — and the family and friends who they drag along — will find it easy to translate.

Obviously some plot points are skipped in such a short synopsis, but the ones that made the cut are treated with high hilarity.  Favorites include Lord Voldemort, the dragons from book four, and the bigger-than-life quidditch snitch.

Dan and Jeff cracked up a few times during the show, but the reason was pretty obvious –

They are as wild about Harry as the audience.

I read.  Go to the movies or a show.  Often just hop online.

Clearly that wouldn’t work for this guy.

Kudos to him for raising money for charity!

Be immortalized in cake.

Betty White was.

We’re talking a 5’2″ life-size vanilla cake with buttercream, covered in modeling chocolate.  It was created by Cake Boss star Buddy Valastro and his team.

And you thought Betty couldn’t get any sweeter.

The cake was served at Wednesday night at Betty’s roast at the Friars Club here in New York City…hence their motto at the base (where Betty’s feet should be).

Funny thing — being roasted?

Not on my list.

I met them years ago on a plane, and liked them both very both.  So the loss seems very personal.

Below is the blog entry I wrote in 2010 about my Kennedy encounter.

—————

I read today that Bobby Kennedy, Jr. filed for a divorce from his wife Mary. That’s too bad.  They seemed like such a nice couple…

When I met them.

Yeah, you read it right.  I met Bobby and Mary Kennedy.  They sat next to me on a flight from Denver to Aspen.  We were all en route to the 2nd Annual US Comedy Arts Festival. I was on a research trip for Hallmark Cards; Bobby was going to introduce Garry Trudeau, his good friend and creator of the “Doonesbury” comic strip, who was being honored at the festival.

The small jet had no first class; that’s why they were seated next to me.  I recognized them immediately when they boarded just moments before take-off — my mother loved the Kennedys like most Catholics of her generation — but I didn’t let on.

They were very friendly and chatted with me during the short flight.  When they realized I was going to the festival as well, they mentioned their friend Garry — by first name only — and said ‘perhaps they’d see me there.’

It was a great story to share with my co-workers, who were seated elsewhere on the plane.

I attended the Doonesbury retrospective and only made the ‘Kennedy connection’ when Bobby stepped up to the podium to introduce ‘his friend Garry.’  After the event was over, attendees were invited to a gallery next door exhibiting framed “Doonesbury” cartoons.

As I was milling around with my co-workers, I suddenly heard shouts of  “Carla!  Carla!”  There across the room were Mary and Bobby Kennedy, smiling and waving.  Garry Trudeau stood at their side.

The rest of the evening was kind of a rock star moment for me.  I got to hang with the Kennedys for a while.  I met Garry Trudeau, whose comic strips helped Watergate make sense, and I was able to get his autograph for my brother Kent.

And best of all?  The look on my co-workers’ faces.

Priceless.

Probiotics, don’t you know — the ‘friendly bacteria’ that Jamie Lee Curtis gets all giggly about.

But my dog is a picky little shit.  You change his food one iota, and he won’t touch it…which makes any change in his diet a real pain in the probiotic.

There are some animals, though, who are real fans of the yogurt cure.

Maybe Rory will listen to the bird.