Tag Archives: airplane flight

Safety is fun!

Move over, Southwest Airlines.  There’s a new contender for ‘funniest in the air.’

Delta Airlines

Their new safety video is filled with sight gags large and small.  I’ve seen it on two flights, and am still discovering all the little surprises they have left for the attentive viewer.

juggling chainsawscartwheelsMy favorites?  Bogus safety stickers featured on distant cabin walls.  Sure, we are used to observing “No smoking” and “No electronics”…but “No juggling chainsaws” and “No cartwheels”?

(The video version on my flight also featured “No comb overs”, which I sadly could not find online.)

A robot turns himself off when the cabin door shuts.  The main spokesperson changes clothing and accessories for no apparent reason. And remember the “cat lady” who did the previous safety video for Delta? She makes a cameo, too.

It’s worth a watch or two or seven.  I’ve never enjoyed a safety video more. Or, in fact…

Watched one.

Sleep easy

I had to set a really early alarm to catch my flight to Dallas this morning, and I actually slept until it went off.  My secret?

The Quil.

Usually if I have to get up super early for any reason, I wake up every hour on the hour to check and make sure I am not sleeping through my alarm.

It’s really annoying.

Then I’m awake before my alarm goes off and really tired from my night of no sleep.

But yesterday I had the beginnings of  a head cold.  And since I was taking DayQuil yesterday, I took NyQuil last night to complete the continuous cycle of medication I had started.  As a result, I slept like a baby…and seriously thought my smoke detector was beeping when I was jarred awake in the wee hours.

What have we learned?

NyQuil.  It’s not just for head colds anymore.

Animal instinct

On my flight today, the proffered movie was Big Miracle, starring Drew Barrymore and John Krasinski — the whale movie, as you might remember it.

That’s how I did.

I had meant to see it in the theatre, but I tend to shy away from animal movies.  Even though I knew this one was positive — it’s based on true events — I hate seeing animals in any potential, dramatized or real trauma.

But I manned up and watched it today.  And I was right.  They found ways to make the animals — and me — suffer through this supposed feel-good story.

It’s so nice to cry with people you don’t know.

Which made the e-card that popped up in my Facebook feed today all the more timely:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

You got that right.

 

 

 

 

 

Captain, my captain

Have you ever wanted to know more about the people piloting your airplane?

Be careful what you wish for.

On my flight to Chicago yesterday, I sat next to a pilot who was dead heading back home. He was especially chatty, so I learned quite a bit about this life and his schedule. And his criminal record.

You heard me.

Back when he was flying cargo planes, he and his co-pilot were arrested for trafficking cocaine in the Carribean.  The white stuff was hidden in the cockpit but he said it was already on the plane when they came aboard.

Uh huh.

They were detained for three weeks in a Dominican prison before their lawyers cleared up the ‘misunderstanding.’  He seemed most upset that his tann faded during his incarceration.

T. M. I.

Let’s go flying

As I write this, I’m flying home from Vegas.

Yes, I’m flying on 9/11.

I have flown on the anniversary of the attacks almost every year since 2001.  I won’t lie; it does give me a moment’s pause, but only because that date is etched on my mind as it no doubt is on yours.

But to refuse to travel today would mean the terrorists won.  To be scared to go about my day-to-day activities…to be frightened to be in or to live in New York City — is ridiculous.

I refuse to live in fear.

Plus, if I had flown another day, I wouldn’t have had the chance to meet the couple from Switzerland on my flight today.  They just completed a three-week motorcycle tour of the western US.  On Harleys.  Had the leather jackets on and everything.

Now, that’s the American way.

Belly up

Remember The Accidental Tourist, starring William Hurt and Geena Davis?

(It came out way back in 1988 — Davis won an Oscar.)

Hurt portrayed travel writer Macon Leary, whose books were geared toward people who want to travel with “the minimum fuss and as little impact as possible on their lives.”

I realize I have become somewhat of an ‘accidental’  business traveler.

Once I hit the airport, I am focused on one goal:  getting to my destination as quickly as possible (with supporting goals of checking email, charging my phone and getting snacks for the plane). Though surrounded by literally hundreds of people, I’m in my own little world.

Even yesterday, with two hours until departure, I charged with single minded determination toward my gate at LAX.  But a chance glimpse of the UK-Florida basketball game in progress on a TV in an airport ‘On the Border’ pulled me up short.  So I decided to stop and watch.

Now, I usually always ask for a table in a restaurant.  Tables give me room for my entree and my phone or magazine or book.  It’s just more comfortable…and more private.

But yesterday, there wasn’t a table in sight, so I took a seat at the bar… and was quickly reminded of all the reasons why bars are great in the first place.

The bartender was a character — quick with a refill and a clever word.  The guy next to me was also a college basketball fan…and a proud grandfather.  When I started cheering on the Cats, a couple at the other end of the bar joined in.

Soon a UCLA alum and union organizer — who knew that job still existed?  — sat down and joined in the conversation.  When the Cats defeated the Gators, the whole bar joined me in clapping.

I was sad to have to leave.

But now back in New York, I can enjoy thinking about the people I met ‘by accident’ on my way home from work.

View from the center

Dear passenger in seat 15E, American Airlines Flight 1987, Miami to New York-LaGuardia, Wednesday evening:

We both got stuck in center seats last night on the flight home.  I share your pain.

I changed to an earlier flight at the last minute, so I know why I was there.  Maybe you don’t fly that often with American.  Or maybe you don’t fly that much at all.

If it’s the former, you should know better.  If it’s the latter, here’s a little primer on airplane etiquette.

When you decide to recline your seat back — which is fully your right as a traveler on a plane, because your seat does recline — it’s better for everyone involved if you take it slow.

Better for you because a slow recline feels good.  The designers and engineers who made that airplane seat are no doubt very proud of the slow, smooth action we all enjoy when we push that button and the seat reclines to its fullest extent in one graceful motion.

Your decision to push the button and slam the seat back with the full force of your body means you can’t enjoy that action.  You probably also reduce the life of the seat itself by abusing the controls, and most importantly…

…you almost got me in the face with your seat back.

This may shock you, fellow traveler, but there is someone sitting behind you.  Sometimes we even have our tray table down with an open beverage on it.

Your actions — your totally self-involved, unthinking, ‘I’m in my travel bubble, to hell with everyone else’ actions — need to change.  Because you don’t travel alone; you travel with a lot of other people.

And we need to get along…especially the unfortunate folk stuck in the center seats.

Air space

So, I’m standing in Hudson News at DFW this afternoon, pretending to select a magazine (but really in a bit of a post-meeting fog), when the lights in the airport newsstand suddenly appeared to dim.

It wasn’t an emergency situation, or even a passing storm.  No, the tallest airline pilot I have ever seen in my life stood next to me and temporarily blotted out the light!

I kid you not — this guy must have been seven feet tall!  I spent the rest of my time at the racks watching him stare at magazines and wondered…

How the heck does he fit in that teeny tiny cockpit??

Granted, in the post-9/11 era, none of us are doing cockpit tours a la “Airplane!”  But from the quickest of peeks that I’ve taken when boarding, their ride looks even more cramped than mine back in coach.

So, I did what I always do when I have a question — I turn to Google.  According to airlinepilotforums.com, all jets have adjustable rudder pedals and seats.  So, presumably, even the Goliath pilot that was purchasing woodworking mags earlier today has legroom during his flight.

So, now I know.  And now you know.

And when I get on my flight today, I’m going to ask the flight attendant where my adjustable rudder pedals are!