The following post is a re-edit of a Sticky Egg blog entry dated November 5, 2009. The names have been changed, but let’s face it…
No one is innocent here.
I’m sorry, Philadelphia Boston. I didn’t mean to.
When I moved to New York City three five years ago, I had hoped being a sports team ‘good luck charm’ would help the Mets, but alas — the Yankees Giants won…again.
Even though my powers are extremely strong — and are becoming more legendary by the day– I’ve never had much control over them.
They first surfaced in Kansas City in 1992. Mere weeks after I moved there, Joe Montana signed with the Chiefs. Kansas City didn’t win a Super Bowl under Joe, but they were definitely post-season contenders.
I moved to Boston in 2000 and lived there for six years. I think we all know the impact I had there. Two World Series wins for the famously denied Boston Red Sox. The Patriots win the Super Bowl not once, not twice, but three times.
But the minute I moved to New York City — we’re talking, I’d been in town just a couple of months — the New York Giants win the Super Bowl, defeating the New England Patriots.
Ouch.
My power is infinite and brutal and — with the Yankees’ World Series win just last night now that the Giants have handed the Patriots their second defeat — impossible to target.
I’m starting to wonder who’s behind my powers, and more importantly — what city is gonna pay me for them?
Chicago, I’m in the book.
Who, moi?
Finally — a reason to watch an awards show red carpet!
Oui!
Now there’s a red carpet interviewer who’s bound to ask something more interesting than ‘Who are you wearing?’ Heck, I bet Miss Piggy will proposition a celebrity or two (George Clooney) and throw a punch if said celebrity’s leggy girlfriend (Stacey Keibler) gets in the way.
Plus, it’s nice to see a television host who hasn’t starved herself to death to get the job…or filled her face with Botox or other fillers to maintain a youthful appearance.
(I’m pretty sure she’ll just put on a new head for the broadcast.)
Muppets rule. Congrats, Piggy!
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Posted in Academy Awards, Animals, Celebrities, Comedy, Commentary, Entertainment, Humor, Life, Movies, Oscars
Tagged BAFTA Awards, Botox, celebrities, comedy, commentary, entertainment, fillers, George Clooney, Humor, interviewer, life, London, Miss Piggy, moi, Movies, Muppets, Muppets rule, Oscars, oui, red carpet, red carpet host, Stacey Keibler, television host