Tag Archives: live one

Dead heading

We’ve all sat next to a ‘live one’ on an airplane.

You know, that passenger who just won’t stop talking — who’s super psyched about life. Perhaps it’s their first time flying…or they’re on vacation (instead of business like you). And they simply won’t be quiet.

At that very moment — wouldn’t you trade them for a corpse?

A Swedish woman didn’t have a choice.  She sat next to an honest-to-goodness dead body during her entire 10-hour flight to Tanzania.

He was alive when he boarded, but began to have convulsions and passed away soon after take-off.  There were no other seats available, so the poor woman was stuck with her now silent seat partner until the plane landed.

I know it sounds creepy.  And all my sympathies go out to the deceased man’s family and friends.  But ya gotta admit — there are advantages to sitting next to a dead man.

  1. No talking.  If there is, he ain’t dead.
  2. No sharing the arm rest.  The flight attendant can position him to give you maximum room in the row.
  3. No getting up to let him go to the bathroom. (This assumes the corpse is seated next to the window.  That’s where I’d put him.)
  4. All magazines are fair game. Is your crossword puzzle filled in?  Use the corpse’s!  I don’t think he’ll mind.
  5. More drinks and snacks for you. Take an extra Diet Coke and warmed nuts when the flight attendant passes by.  Just be sure to raise your glass in memory of the corpse.

He’s made your flight extra special.