Tag Archives: philosophy

Latter days

There are a lot of things I expect to find in Times Square.

Tourists.  Jammed sidewalks.  Street vendors.  More tourists.  Theatres.  Traffic.  Hey look — more tourists.

But ads for the Mormons — not the musical, the church — on every surface?

That’s a bit surprising.

The ad campaign by The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints was launched last week in Times Square in an attempt to re-brand the Mormon faith as “normal.”

The ads feature photos of ethnically-diverse, regular people.  One guy is even riding a motorcycle.

Yep.  Looks pretty normal from here.

Why the LDS church chose now to launch their campaign can be debated.  Is it because of the upcoming presidential campaign, which includes a Mormon GOP candidate?  I don’t know; he’s run before without their intervention.

Or is the timing and location of the campaign in response to the wildly successful Broadway show The Book of Mormon, which won nine Tonys (including Best Musical) and will no doubt go on to do a national tour?

If so, Church Fathers, worry no more.  The Book of Mormon is one of the most positive things to happen to your religion since the golden plates.  Everyone who walks out of the theatre knows more about your faith and the commonalities it shares with their own.

The humor unites us.  The ads?

They’re just more traffic.

Lock me up

Every two years, the Mercatus Center at George Mason University publishes their “Freedom in the 50 States” index.

This year’s most free state?  It’s a virtual tie…between New Hampshire and South Dakota.  And the least free state?

New York

Lady Liberty, look the other way.  (Oh good, she is.)

Turns out my beloved Empire State got dinged for our particularly high taxes, health insurance regulations, anti-smoking laws, lack of medical marijuana and no same-sex marriage (only one vote away!).

Oh…that.

Jason Sorens, co-author of the study and assistant professor at CUNY Buffalo — who (ahem) lives in New York — admits the state has other benefits.

“New York City has a lot going for it…if you like culture, the arts, music, having lots of things to do, nightlife — you’re going to value having more things to do even if you feel more impinged upon.”

Exactly, Jason.  And the things that may make other people feel ‘impinged upon’ — not being able to smoke in Central Park, for example — don’t make me feel any less free.

That’s the beauty of the USA.  There are 50 different states.  If you don’t like the one you’re in, you can move to one you like better.

Like I did.

Freedom’s just another word for nothing left to lose…” Me & Bobby McGee, Janis Joplin

Just breathe

For just one day…

…wouldn’t it be nice?

No butts

And breathe, just breathe,
Woah breathe, just breathe… — Anna Nalick

Come to New York City — it’s a great place to breathe!

Effective today, smoking is banned in public spaces, including parks, beaches, and pedestrian plazas.  That means your stroll through Central Park, Times Square and other popular spots where tourists gather won’t be polluted with cigarette smoke.

Smokers who violate the ban will be given one warning, then charged a $50 fine.  The New York City Parks Department, not police officers, will enforce the ban.

Way to go, Mayor Bloomberg.

Everyone doesn’t share my happiness.  A ‘smoke-in’ is scheduled today at City Hall by the New York Citizens Lobbying Against Smoker Harassment to protest the ban.

So, there’s one place where breathing will be especially hazardous to your health today.  But for the rest of the city, breathe in!

Second-hand smoke just got the ol’ one-two punch.



Soaring profits

Survived the rapture, did you?

Don’t think of it as ‘being passed over.’  You’re an American – make money from your rejection!

There’s even a common sense guide to help you get started.

Written before the last regularly scheduled rapture, “How to Profit from the Coming Rapture” offers sound — if tongue-in-cheek — financial guidance for those of us left on Earth to fend for ourselves.  (If you’re reading this, that means you.)

The writers, while having a bit of fun with the whole notion, apparently quote actual Bible verses and legends to support their economic theories.  It all sounds a bit Book of Mormon to me.  And since I love that Broadway show, I’m guessing this book will be fun, too!

What, you say?  I haven’t read the book yet?  Of course not!  I had to wait and see if I got called aboard the mothership!

Now…let’s all get RICH!!!

Working it out

I grew up in a home where work was very clearly defined by gender.

Women cleaned the house, cooked — well, Mom cooked — and did the dishes.  Men took out the trash, did the yard work, and maintained the cars.

It was all very Ozzie and Harriet…which I found odd, considering we were a single-parent household.  In fact, my mother and I had many colorful conversations on this very topic.

The times, they are a’changing.

Two separate studies have revealed that men are getting less handy around the house, and women are losing their “lady skills” (their words, not mine).

A study by AA Home Emergency Response shows that, over the past 40 years, the percentage of men able to perform home maintenance has steadily declined — from 71% in 1970 to just 44% today.  Similarly, social researcher Mark McCrindle found that only 51 per cent of women under 30 can cook a roast, hem a skirt, or iron a shirt, compared with 82 per cent of baby boomers.

Oh, the humanity.

Both studies posit possible reasons why.   One suggests that parents aren’t passing down the skills to their children. (So that’s why I can’t cook.)  Plus, men and women today are both in the workforce and developing new skills their parents didn’t need, especially with technology.

Let’s face it — today both sexes are (gasp) crossing gender lines to do chores.  I know many couples where the man has primary responsibility in the kitchen (or else, they’d starve).  Housework is shared according to talent or interest or simply who has time.

I love the fact that housework today is becoming simply work, without any genetic BS about who’s supposed to do it.

Except at my house.  (Anyone found a study about dogs and chores yet?)

Blood type

Now that the phrase ‘tiger’s blood’ has invaded pop-speak, you might secretly be wondering if you have it. Well, that all depends…

Are you a yin (dragon) or a yang (tiger)?

Yep.  The Chinese philosophy of feng shui — and the over 3,000 year old yin-yang theory — can help you answer a question posed oh-so-recently by the drug-addled brain of Charlie Sheen.

Yin-yang theory is the belief that everything in the universe is comprised of complementary elements.  The yin (dragon) represents more feminine traits, the yang (tiger) more masculine qualities.

And you only have to answer 10 simple questions to know which way your blood is boiling!

Take the test.  How’d ya do?

I am a bit of both, so if I do have any ‘tiger’s blood,’ I fear it’s been diluted by the dragon within.

THANK GOD.

Something reel

Hey — Whole Foods.  You and me?  We need to talk.

I know you’re big in the natural and organic foods biz.  At last count, you had more than 300 stores in North America and the UK.  Good for you…couldn’t have happened to a greener bunch of guys.

But movies?  They’re my guilty pleasure, and I’m okay with that.  But nooooooo…here you come along, trying to make the whole movie-going experience GOOD for me.

Bastards.

The Do Something Reel™ Film Festival, sponsored by Whole Foods, will visit over 40 cities during the month of April.  The six theatrical features illustrate in film “how the choices we make can have a huge impact on our bodies, our economy, and our environment.”

Plus, they’re as good for you as a Chai Almond Smoothie.

The film’s subject matter varies — the foods you eat, the bags you carry, coal in America and disappearing bees — but they all support the themes of Earth Month.

Okay.  I’ll admit the films sound interesting.  Heck, I’ll even attend if New York City makes the short list.

But we gotta have a chat about the snack list…

Balls

I hate this column.

But that no doubt was sportswriter Greg Couch’s intent.

In the maiden days of March Madness, he has the nerve to suggest that NBA basketball is more exciting, its superstars more beloved.

Bite me.

College basketball will always be about more than agent negotiations and the biggest payday.

In the NCAA, bad behavior happens, yes, but it’s not celebrated and encouraged and splashed all over Twitter and Facebook and Entertainment Tonight. Breaking rules equals sanctions and suspensions and no tournament play.

The college players and teams on the floor this weekend and the weekends to come in March have earned their berth.  With talent.  Dedication. Teamwork. And with thousands of students and alumni behind them who won’t change their allegiance due to geography or money or scandal or a losing season or two.

The NBA can never buy that.

So, Greg, feel free to sit back and watch the overpriced players in the NBA run and gun every night of the week.  Just don’t get too comfy.

Your favorite might be playing for the other guys tomorrow.

Being neighborly

After a damp and dreary weekend, Rory Dog and I enjoyed a long walk in Central Park this morning.

As we were making the final turn toward home, we passed the Subway shoppe on Columbus Avenue and 84th. Its bright decor caught my eye, a contrast to the earthier tones employed by the coffee shop, barber shop, nail salon and grocery store on that block.

It seemed cheerier and more welcoming.

Funny…I’m not sure it’s getting the same reception from the neighbors.

You see, Subway used to be one block away at Columbus and 83rd.  When it closed its doors, I heard the locals rejoice…like a crack palace had finally been shut down.

Chain restaurants get that kinda treatment around here.

Remember Fox Books in the movie You’ve Got Mail? Big, bad Fox Books moved in the Upper West Side, and people picketed in outrage.  Eventually local store The Shoppe Around the Corner had to close.

David didn’t defeat Goliath in that story.  (But Meg Ryan and Tom Hanks got together..so that was nice.)

When Subway reopened its doors less than a year later just a couple of blocks up the street, folks weren’t too happy.

Me?   I think the chain restaurants that are successful tend to be successful because they have a good product.  So we shouldn’t poo poo them because they are doing something right.

No one in the neighborhood seems to mind the 10 Starbucks.

That’s right — 10.