Tag Archives: weight loss

Sweet success

Mark Haub, I want to shake your hand.

Or perhaps you’d prefer a snack cake.

Thanks to the research you conducted at Kansas State University — Go Wildcats — there is now empirical evidence that weight loss depends on the calories going in…and not the nutritional value of the food.

Haub, a human nutrition professor, put himself on the ‘convenience store diet’ as part of a class project, restricting himself to 1800 calories a day comprised of Twinkies, Nutty Bars, Oreos, and even Doritos.

Haub shed 27 pounds in two months, and his other health factors improved as well.  Lower triglycerides.  Lower bad cholesterol.  Higher good cholesterol.

He did take a multivitamin and drink a protein shake each day, and tried to eat a vegetable serving as well — usually something green.  But at least two-thirds of his daily diet came from snack foods.

In the CNN article, Haub sounds a little conflicted by his success.   Personally, I feel vindicated.   Although my diet is not as junkie as his study, I have never eaten as healthy as experts recommend, and have gotten my share of flack about it over the years.

Now, when I reach for Froot Loops as a snack, I’ve got scientific proof –

It’s diet food, people.

Color crime

If you have a few extra pounds on your person, don’t blame yourself.

Blame Benjamin Moore.

A study published in a recent issue of Contract magazine reveals that people who eat in kitchens and dining areas painted red, orange and yellow feel hungrier.  The sunnier hues apparently make food more attractive.

To eat less, we need to surround ourselves with blue light and blue tones…or, at the very least, use blue utensils and dishes to help curb our hunger.

Now they tell me!

My entire house  is a tribute to the colors red, yellow and orange.  They’re even in my bathroom.  I have always loved their energy and fire, but now I guess — deep down – I was really just looking for another excuse to eat.

This revelation has its advantages.  Now, if I gain a pound or two, it’s not my fault; it’s the yellow paint in my kitchen.  And all those red dishes.  Or maybe the orange FLOR tiles in the living room.  Heck, I even have a red leather love seat.

I’m the victim here!

Fickle fat

So, I have decided the current recommended way to revive a lackluster career is to gain a lot of weight and then take it off as a spokesperson for Jenny Craig or Weight Watchers or such.

Look at what it it has done for Valerie Bertinelli and Marie Osmond — both had practically disappeared from the public eye, and now — BAM — everywhere you look, there they are, and  ’50 pounds lighter’ to boot.

And, now even comedians — the ones you’d think would make the biggest fun of this phenomena — are joining in.

Jason Alexander, George from “Seinfeld.”

Nicole Sullivan of “MADtv” and “King of Queens.”

Sara Rue of “Less than Perfect.”

Really?  Is this the only way to get your name back out there?

Or can actors only lose weight when everyone is watching them (or someone is paying them to do it)?

I suppose it’s inspirational on some level.  But mostly, it comes across as desperate.

Oh well…reality shows have trained us to enjoy desperate.

Starve on!