Spins, spangles, and sprains — oh my!

  • Republican Senator Tom Delay injured, but willing to stay in ‘for the win’
  • Donny Osmond considered an early contender
  • Macy Gray merely phoning it in

What do these celebrity tidbits have to do with each other? With you? With this column?

They are just a few of the early rumors swirling around the Internet about the as-yet-not-begun 2009 season of ‘Dancing with the Stars.’

If you have poo-poo’ed DWTS in the past because it’s a reality show, or you’re not much for dancing, believe me — the show title doesn’t tell the half of it.

It has dancing, sure, and B-list celebrities up the wazoo.  But DWTS has drama.  It has the kind of injuries reserved for extreme sports.  Dancers and celebs have affairs.  Marriages are ended.  Careers are reborn in one well-executed cha cha.

And host, Tom Bergeron, makes it all work.  Because he is funny.  And lightning quick with all the unscripted, crazy stuff that happens every week LIVE — fainting, arguments, clothing malfunctions — you name it!

It all begins this Monday night on ABC. You’d be crazy to miss it.

Plus, do you really want to flunk my post-show pop quiz??

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