Keep moving

“Give me a place to stand, and I will move the Earth.”

Archimedes, considered by many to be the greatest mathematician of all time, said that.

Clearly he never loitered in New York City.

On two separate occasions yesterday afternoon, while shopping around my neighborhood in the Upper West Side, I became a person of interest…

….simply because I stood in one place too long.

The first incident occurred in Barnes & Noble.  I was talking on my cell phone and moved to a deserted corner so I wouldn’t disturb anyone with my conversation.  After a while, I noticed B&N security standing to one side, pointedly looking at me.  The guard continued to stare until I moved to another section of the store.

I’m so gangsta.

Since they didn’t have the magazine I was looking for anyway, I continued walking down the street.  When the  wind picked up, I stepped into a deep window alcove to shield the phone’s mouthpiece.  The window shutters were closed, so I didn’t pay attention to the folks inside.

Until I realized they had noticed me.

There was a kitchen on the other side.  The cooks gave me curious looks through the narrow space between the slats.  Eventually one moved closer to the window, stirring the batter in his bowl, squinting in curiosity.

That’s when I decided to move it along….and realized another wonderful advantage of having a home.

Sure, it provides shelter from the elements and a place to sleep.  But it’s the one place you can sit on your butt or stand in place without moving — no explanation required.

So, that’s why we pay the big rents in NYC.

2 responses to “Keep moving

  1. I would have flipped the bird to the security guards and left. Yeah, you’re going to shake down a book store. RIIIIIIIGHT.

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