Tag Archives: Humor

Hard to swallow

I loved grape soda as a child, and more than once have lamented the lack of diet options.

How about a liquored up one?

Hard-Grape-6pk_web

Henry’s Hard Grape is all grown up — 4.2 percent alcohol by volume, as you can see — with cool retro branding.

I appreciate both.

I was curious enough to buy a six-pack, and it’s pretty tasty. But my diet soda sensibilities are offended by the cane sugar.  To this day, it’s hard for me to drink anything with calories.

Those six hard sodas are gonna last me a good long time.

Kick this around

13-reasons-why

If you haven’t started watching Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why, or are in the midst of the series, don’t worry —

There are no spoilers here. Just one question (and kind of a tangential one at that).

Do bicycles not have kickstands anymore?

We see Clay Jensen ride around town as he tries to solve the show’s central mystery, and he throws his bike down on the ground like an unloved toy. He has bounced that thing off of cement, buildings, trees — you name it — and it’s been shoved into a lot of car trunks, too.

That bike gets no respect.

I have to think a kickstand would be a major improvement. But perhaps they just aren’t cool in 2017.

I don’t know….I may need 13 reasons way.

History repeats itself

vandy northwesternVandy, take heart —

You’re not the first team to lose a NCAA tournament game in the final seconds because of a brain fart.

Ignore the histrionics of the play-by-play announcers. Turn off the post-game shows. Consider hypnosis?

I’m old enough to remember a really big blunder that kept the storied Michigan Fab Five out of the Final Four. It was way back in 1993 before the Interwebs.

webberMichigan vs. North Carolina in the Elite Eight. North Carolina up by 2 with 11 seconds to go. Trapped on the sidelines, Michigan star Chris Webber called a time out that they simply didn’t have, and got dinged with a technical foul. North Carolina went on to win the game and ultimately the national title.

Sure, I remember that brain fart to this day, but Vandy — your game was just a first-rounder.   There are plenty of bracket busters ahead that will inspire much more ire.

Take heart.

One ringy dingy

Finally — some good news!

Lily Tomlin

The very funny Lily Tomlin will be presented with the Live Achievement Award at tonight’s SAG Awards.

Since Lily’s parents are from Paducah, Kentucky — a city very close to my hometown — this feels like a big win for small town girls everywhere.

I saw Lily in Paducah. She was eating with a friend at Chuck e Cheese. The waitress recognized her, and then she was very quickly surrounded by fans. She was really nice about it, which made me like her even more.

Actually, any celebrity that eats at Chuck e Cheese is a friend of mine.

Horn of plenty

Like so many of you, I was in an airport on Thanksgiving eve. And since it was raining in both my departure and arrival cities, I ended up sitting on the tarmac…

DELAYED.

Luckily, it was only a little over an hour. And I had the forethought to bring snacks. THE snack of the Thanksgiving holiday — Bugles corn chips.

Sure, we’ve all put them on our fingers at one time or another to look witchy, but on Turkey Day, they are the perfect little cornucopia of salty goodness.

I expect someone to make these for me.

Hello, and this…

The Egg has seen an influx of new visitors this week —

A very sticky welcome!

And to those of you who are fellow US citizens…

vote

Good grief 

Met Life, say it isn’t so.

You’re dropping Peanuts as the spokes characters for your brand?

Snoopy and the gang can sell anything…plus, your timing couldn’t be worse. 

The popular comic just released a new feature film, and a weekly cartoon series  is coming to television at the end of the year. Not to mention a new book (that I wrote) which is being released November 1st.

If I saw the Met Life folks, I think I would probably say: