Tag Archives: marketing

What a treat

In my ‘other life,’ I write marketing copy.

Web, collateral, packaging — you name it.

As I was feeding my dog this morning, I received a reminder that any customer-facing text can surprise and delight…

Even something as simple as the freshness dating.



The name game

Is your name Chris? Or Audrey? Or Dominic? There’s a Diet Coke out there with your name on it.













I found this bottle with Chris’ name on it at a hoagie shop near the Amtrak station in Paoli, Pennsylvania.  When I asked the employee at the counter about it, he had no clue what Coke was doing.

Which was helpful.

So I searched the bottle’s #ShareaCoke hashtag on Twitter and found a large community of people who had tweeted pics holding a bottle of Diet Coke bearing their own name!  How lucky for them.

I tweeted my Chris pic.  Hopefully he (or she) will appreciate it.  And if someone out there finds the elusive Carla bottle, comment/tweet/email/Facebook me.

This is suddenly very important.


We all have name brand products that we love.

I prefer Pepsi products to Coke.  Jif Peanut Butter over Skippy.  Cheetos to any ‘imitation’ cheese puff.

But would I willingly get a tattoo of a favorite brand logo if it meant a 20 percent discount for life?

Not even.

But that is exactly what Ecko Unlimited is currently purposing to its brand faithful.  And they appear to be perfectly seriously.

The popular line of t-shirts, denim, polos, and sneakers is offering a 20 percent life-time discount to anyone who gets a tattoo of the brand’s iconic rhino or shears on their person.

Sound like a deal?

Before you run out and invest in a new tramp stamp, do the math.  If the Ecko Unlimited tee you are jonesin’ for retails at $30, the brand permanently decorating your backside only saves you $6.

Six bucks!

They expect people to turn themselves into a billboard for that?  Sorry, Ecko — personal real estate carries a far heftier price.

Shopper fatigue

Do you like being lost?  Disoriented?

IKEA is betting your own cold, hard cash that you don’t.  That’s why they’ve designed their stores like a maze.

It takes the average shopper three hours  — and some as long as eight — to weave their way through the retailer’s carefully merchandised, catalog-inspired stores.  So by the time shoppers are able to find the warehouse area where they can actually purchase something and leave, they usually buy stuff they never intended (or perhaps even wanted).

It’s simple psychology, says Alan Penn, director of the Virtual Reality Centre for the Built Environment at University College London.  The longer shoppers are exposed to IKEA’s products, the more impulse buys they are likely to make.  And the confusing layout means they grab stuff when they see it, because backtracking to find items later would require bread crumbs…or an overnight stay.

This type of conscious manipulation kinda creeps me out…and pisses me off a little.  I have always thought of IKEA products as sleek, modern and forward thinking — all about ease and simplicity.

But this kind of marketing duplicity runs counter to their brand image.  When your products are as cool as IKEA’s — and as well-priced — do you really have to trap shoppers in the store to make sure they buy enough before they leave?

Maybe I’m the one being simple.


As someone who doesn’t own any Apple products — that’s right, people, nary a one — I am often fascinated by the passion that iPod, iPad and iPhone owners exhibit when speaking about their toys.

To an outsider, they look and sound like members of a bizarre religious cult.  The zeal in their eyes is unnerving and feverishly bright.  Their quick defense against any perceived insult towards the brand seems almost a rote recitation of hallowed Apple lore.

That must be some tasty Kool-Aid they’re servin’.

I was reminded of this phenomenon Wednesday during my flight to New Orleans.  A true Apple-tonian (Apple-ite?  Appler?) was seated behind me.  As he was putting away his phone for takeoff, the gentleman seated next to him asked if it was the new iPhone4.

Two and a half hours later — when the plane was landing — that apostle of all things Apple emerged from the zone and took a breath.

During that time, he had lovingly detailed every feature, every app, every dimple and dent of his beloved iPhone, the number of “likes” littering his speech increasing exponentially with his level of excitement.

I’ll admit, Apple makes amazing products and has even more effective marketing.  But even their biggest fan on the plane conceded that his iPhone was shit at making phone calls.  Didn’t work well at all.   But this too he turned into an iPositive.

“It’s the only way I can truly escape,” he said with a contented sigh.  “Having ‘no service’ is the perfect excuse.”

Somewhere, an Apple genius has a tear in his eye.

Something wicked…

Do you realize “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows” is only a month away?

I am so excited, my tingly parts have tingly parts!!

In an attempt to build this anticipation to an even more feverish pitch, the movie producers just released “Harry Potter” character artwork to local theaters.  Ginormous banners  will soon be adorning the walls and hallways of your local movie house…and they are frickin brilliant.

If you didn’t already know how dark and foreboding the final installments are gonna be, the artwork certainly tells the tale.  Take a look.




















I think they really capture the personalities of the characters. You can even sense Snape’s duality (maybe I just looked at it a bit too long.)  Hermoine seems seriously pissed, though… this last book must really take a toll.

Which character banner is your favorite?  Cast your vote in The Sticky Egg’s very first fan poll.  And meet me in the theater November 19th at midnight for the opening of “Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.”

Use your words

When the first trailer for “Dinner for Schmucks” popped up in theaters, I thought the premise was ridiculous.

A guy can only get promoted if he brings the biggest idiot to a secret corporate dinner?  I mean, seriously — what were they smoking at the pitch for that movie?

But then,  they assembled a dream cast.  Paul Ruud. Steve Carell. Zach Galifianakis.  And the clips look pretty hilarious.

I’ll bite.

But before I go to the movie this weekend, at least one of the morning or late night talk hosts promoting the film this week has to get the name right.

It’s “Dinner for Schmucks.”  Not Smucks.  Or Shucks.  Or whatever the heck it is you guys are saying.

It’s schmucks.

Hearing everyone mispronounce this very common Yiddish insult is driving me insane.  Is it a network conspiracy?  Like the new show “—- My Dad Says” based on the Twitter account, where they have replaced the very common curse word with hash marks.

Is “schmuck” such a bad word that everyone has agreed to say it wrong?  That’s even more ridiculous than the plot of the movie!

And it makes me want to go see it even more.

Stand and deliver

I have my issues with Apple.

They make innovative products — I’ll give them that.  Their really cool looking gizmos do most of the stuff they’re supposed to do.

But they repeatedly rush their products to market under a blaze of brilliantly constructed advertising — honestly, no one does marketing better — and when their products fall short of what was promised, they totally suck on the customer service end.

There was the pre-order debacle — as in, people couldn’t get through to place one.  Now in-store inventories are low.  And lines to get the iPhone 4’s that are available at the stores are ridiculously long.

Apple’s poor follow-through even drove perennial everyman Jason Bateman of “Arrested Development” to pull the celebrity card and cut a 2,000-person long line at a Los Angeles store to get his iPhone.

He got booed when he left.

And what’s this?  There’s a yellow tint or line on their much heralded display.  More seriously, if you hold the phone wrong, you might not get a signal.  Pardon me…I hold my cellphone at the bottom, like a normal person.

I’m not hurling all this bitterness at Apple because I was stuck in a long line waiting for my iPhone.  I use a Palm Pre quite happily.

I just want Apple to realize that customer service is the other side of marketing.  If your can’t deliver on the BS you’re selling…

Don’t sell.

GLEE: A+ GLEE Marketing: A++++++++

I saw the first (and only) episode of ‘GLEE’ earlier this year and loved it. Fun. Original. Inspiring, even. Can’t wait for the series this fall.

But — oh my god — can you believe the GLEE promotion and marketing?

Remember, we have only seen one episode. And already, we’re talking multi-city tour. Throngs of fans wherever they go. Fans who already have a nickname — GLEEKs — after one episode.

This is not a natural phenomenon, my friend. This is the result of a well-designed, extremely well-executed media machine. And whoever is driving it deserves a raise, another raise, and a new car.

Long live GLEE. And long live the marketing mind(s) behind GLEE.

I think I am in love with them.  Call me.