Tag Archives: Twilight

I’m still waiting

I saw Hunger Games – Mockingjay Part 1 this morning.

mockingjayI don’t want to offend anyone with a Twilight comparison, but it reminded me of Twilight Eclipse —

Stuff happened, but it was very much a placeholder until the final installment hits theaters next year.

This Hunger Games has no games, so the energy is inherently lower.  Katniss and the rescued survivors are living below ground in District 13, where everyone wears identical grey jumpsuits — no flaming dresses or garishly bright clothing, even on Effie who is almost unrecognizable.

We only see the folks from the Capitol — including Peeta, who we assume is being held prisoner — on small video screens. But those scenes are, for me, some of the most compelling.

By movie’s end, Katniss and the rebels have rediscovered their energy and purpose, and things are getting really exciting…

And then it’s over.

Should be a great finale…next year.

Advertisements

This is all FOX’s fault

I have not read the Fifty Shades of Grey trilogy — pretty proud of that.

Not that I’m judging a book by its cover it…but it’s nice for a change to not be in a group that is being judged.

(Twilight scars — you understand.)

Although that doesn’t stop me from being interested in the recent casting announcement for the Fifty Shades movie — Dakota Johnson as Anastasia (whoever that is) and Charlie Hunnam as Christian Grey.

Dakota Johnson…in an S&M movie?

She was the quirky, funny, girl-next-door single mom who we loved and lost last season on Ben and Kate.  Well, I loved that show anyhoo.  FOX went and canceled it.

Oh, look how sad they all are.

ben and kate2Of course, Nat Faxon (far right) reached out and got an Oscar for writing The Descendants…and directed, wrote and co-starred in the very funny The Way, Way Back with Steve Carell, so he’s doing alright.  And Dakota gets…whips and chains?

Look what you did, FOX.

Royal flush

There’s Team Edward and Team Jacob. But in the doll making game…

It’s Team William all the way.

Mattel has released a Barbie and Ken version of William and Kate to commemorate their upcoming one-year wedding anniversary.

As you can see, they have given William a full head of hair — something he doesn’t possess in real life — and strengthened his jawline. And although Kate looks a bit like every Barbie I’ve seen, she’s pretty and her gown is spot-on.

No doll marker would risk offending the royal family.

That clearly wasn’t a concern for the Mattel designer selected to create the dolls that recreate the wedding of Bella and Edward in Twilight Breaking Dawn.

I’m guessing he isn’t a fan of the saga.  And Edward in particular.

His doll’s face is flat and fat, and his hair looks like an old lady’s wig.  I know the white makeup isn’t flatteringly on anyone in the movies, but it eliminates all detail here.

In the words of my friend Tina…

Barf.

Spray say

With all the talk of late about pepper spray — meme, ecards, Bella toting it in Twilight (yes, I watched it again on FX) — I found myself wondering:

Is there a difference between pepper spray and mace?

Yes. Yes, there is.

Turns out they are two very different self defense products.

Mace is the brand name for an irritant similar to tear gas and usually has no effect on criminals under the influence of drugs or alcohol.

Pepper spray is an inflammatory agent that will immediately take down and cause temporary pain to an assailant. It inflames the capillaries of the eyes and skin causing temporary blindness, nausea, breathing difficulties and an intense burning sensation.

Wow.

Makes you wonder why pepper spray was the self defense product ‘of choice’ at places like Walmart and Occupy Wall Street.  Wouldn’t a simple irritant have been good enough?

(And wouldn’t nothing have been the best choice?)

Plus, this seems less funny now.  And way more painful.

Bloody smart

Hating Twilight?  It’s practically a national pastime.

So you might expect movies that release this time of year — the same time as Twilight Breaking Dawn: Part 1, which opens this Friday — to hate the franchise as well.  Heck, some of them probably do.

But not The Muppet Movie.

Proving that puppets are smart and pretty, too, The Muppet Movie has chosen to use the frenzy that inevitably surrounds each Twilight installment to their advantage…by creating character posters that parody the sparkly franchise.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I vant to shake their marketing director’s little puppet hand.

Way to work it!

Hands off

And now for something completely different — a disparaging remark about “Twilight.”

Well…not really about the saga itself.   It seems a member of the “Twilight” family is trying to score a bigger slice of the fame pie.

This instance seems particularly grabby….but maybe I should expect that from a hands model.

That’s right.  Kimbra Hickey is a ‘parts model’ — as in hands and feet parts — who lives right here in New York City.  Many moons ago, Hickey earned $300 for 2-hours work — the industry rate — to hold an apple for the book cover of “Twilight.”

Of course, at the time, no one knew what a smash hit the books and subsequent movies would be.  And now Hickey wants her extra pound of flesh.

The model has taken to hanging out at the cash register at the local Barnes & Noble, telling “Twilight” book purchasers ‘those are my hands’ and giving autographs.  She’s also attending “Twilight” fan conventions, selling apple-scented hand lotion.

Her ultimate goal?  A role in the final two “Breaking Dawn” films.

Now, as you know, I’m all about self-promotion.  But Hickey thinking she deserves special treatment from the “Twilight” movie producers based on that photograph would be like me expecting my own Emmy for being an extra in an award-winning episode of “30 Rock.”  Granted, I was, and I joked about it…but I didn’t show up at the after-party and expect to get in, or demand a recurring role on the show.  Even I admit that’s ridiculous.

What do you think?  How should Hickey be handled?  To help you make up your mind, check out her website, where she’s posted ‘Frequently Asked Questions’ and her “Twilight” promotional schedule.

Or just visit Barnes and Noble during your next trip to Manhattan.  I hear her autograph is free…for now.

Look again

There is nothing I love more than watching a movie and discovering a hidden gem.

You know — that actor or actress who’s the friend of the lead who looks kinda familiar but you can’t figure out where you’ve seen ’em before.

But I can.

It’s one of my favorite pastimes.  Ask my friends.  I’m actually pretty annoying about it.  So I cannot believe that I totally missed this one.

After seeing Anna Kendrick play Jessica in three “Twilight” movies and nab a much-deserved Oscar nomination for her work in “Up in the Air,”  it was only this week during publicity for her upcoming stint in “Scott Pilgrim vs. the World” — opening in theaters today — that I realized that I had seen her years ago in a little movie musical called “Camp.”

I think I hear my friends laughing at me….

If you haven’t seen it, “Camp” is about a summer camp for theater geeks.  Anna plays Fritzi, a wallflower who attaches herself to the camp diva…or so it appears.  At the end of the film, when all the campers are performing at the big gala for the parents, Fritzi sabotages the diva and steps in to sing her big number, “Ladies Who Lunch,” blowing off the roof in an incredible performance.

Of course, I didn’t know it was Anna then…just that there was this HUGE voice coming out of a teeny tiny little girl.

And that little girl was Anna Kendrick.

Well, knock me over with a vampire.